For Amber* and her husband, their divorce was a bit unusual. They were married for almost seventeen years. “My husband and I agreed on most things through several mediation sessions during the divorce,” said Amber. One thing that stood out to most of their friends and family was during their separation and transition of their divorce, the two decided to rotate their house and not their child. Amber explained, “When it was not my week to spend with our daughter at the house, I would stay in our travel trailer at the local state park.”
Both parents wanted to make sure that the divorce did not disrupt their daughter’s life. They felt that having her pack her bags, homework and other items to go from one house to the next each week would make it more difficult for her to adjust. They agreed that if they were to have her rotate each week that it would be uprooting her stability and routine. “Instead we made the decision to be the ones inconvenienced,” Amber said. It wasn’t always easy, but Amber knew that as a child of divorce herself, she realized it would have been tough on her daughter.
They utilized the rotation method throughout the transition of their divorce and until Amber could purchase a house, which took about nine months. Their daughter is a well-rounded and secure person, now age twenty-four. She is currently working on her master’s degree at OU in the Health and Science program of dietetics.
To this day, ten years later, both parents share her at birthday’s and special events. Amber and her Ex-Husband are in the process of panning a big wedding next year and the two will be together in the same resort and overseas `for up to three days.
“Taking the Helping Children Cope with Divorce class early in our divorce made a world of difference in our parenting decisions and it confirmed for our daughter that she had the best of both parents in her life. It just goes to show that a contrary situation can have positive results,” expressed Amber.
*Name changed to protect client’s identity